Prune to Bloom

Part of the blooming process requires a clearing of the debris, the old stuff that doesn't support growth any more. To do that can be a bit tricky, because focusing on the old stuff can get me a bit stuck in the muck, so it takes a balance of clearing old debris and filling the present with new.

I love yoga for this, because every time I go into that studio I am lugging stuff that isn't serving me. Throughout the practice I am breaking it up, peeling it off, sweating it out, breathing it away. And when I leave that room, muscles warm and long and lungs expanded, mind crisp and full of optimism, I am freed up to find something new that I can carry into my day. I can't say I'm always successful, but man I sure feel great and hopeful and have a positive intention that I believe makes at least a subtle difference in my trajectory.

My goal is to deliberately bring new, positive and challenging experiences into my life -- that way it won't fill up with old stuff, robotic stuff, the default. Next year I will turn 46 years old, and I can feel my life pushing in a bit, closing a bit, and I know I can't take another 20 years to start making something bigger in my life. I want to bloom big. I want to say something important. I want to make an impact. And pruning is so important - I'm not sure I'm great at it. I think I have been comfortable in certain routines and I've closed off my options. I think the fact that I have not yet written a book, even a draft of a book, is sad evidence that I haven't been serious about doing things I feel are pushing on my heart. Time to prune off the stuff in the way of that. What's in the way?

Time to put writing on my calendar, like appointments. Time to explore ideas and inspiration for my bigger painting works that I want to do. I will structure my consulting work to be the most effective it can be. I will continue my yoga practice and decide when I will sign up for 200 hour teacher training. I will prioritize my wish list for me and my family (skiing! a trip to Europe! back to the beach! hiking another set of trails!) and lock down when and where these things will happen over the next 5 years, and what skills or resources I will need to achieve them. The stuff that doesn't support that will wither and fall away, or be obliterated with a sweep of my calendar schedule. Boom, I'm gonna bloom.